Happy Birthday Adalyn May!

Happy Birthday Adalyn May!

One year ago today you came into this world. From that day we got the huge surprise of the positive pregnancy test even while I sit here contemplating what to write, I can say without a doubt that our lives have forever been changed.

I have been thinking about this day for a while now, and as I thought about it I was trying to anticipate how I would handle it. Would I be able to get out of bed in the morning? Would I be able to make it through a full day of work? Well, I sit here right now with a vast amount of mixed emotions. Of course I am sad and continue to grieve our sweet angel girl, but I also sit here with an amazing amount of joy. When we first found out the diagnosis of Trisomy 13, I was so angry and in disbelief that something that horrible could happen to us. Over the last year I have come to take those feelings back. God did not take our little girl to spite us, he BLESSED us with her. 

Just knowing that He chose us to bring her into the world gives me joy. In Romans 5:3-5 it says: 

3 Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, 4 and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, 5 and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.

I can say without a doubt that we are both better people, better in our relationship, and better in our relationship with Christ. We have grown so much because she was given to us.

Of course not everything about our sweet angel's diagnosis is all peaches and cream, because I still wake up every single day missing her and wishing she was there. We have conversations all the time about what she would be doing today if she were here. Would she be walking already? Probably, because she has her daddy's genes in there. Everytime we walk through the stores and see princess toys or adorable girl's clothes we get a little envious and sad that we can not buy these things for her. We will never be able to buy her tutus or princess clothes, and will never be able to sign her up for soccer or even dance. I think about these things every day.

But then, when I think of these things I still remind myself how blessed we are and how one day in the future we will be able to spend eternity with her and do whatever we want with her. Maybe we will have a family soccer game or eat blueberry softserve ice cream as much as we want. We will get to see her without an ounce of pain or suffering, and she will be her perfect self. Until then, she will be our guardian angel.

For anyone that we do not talk to or see regularly, I am happy to announce that our sweet Adalyn is going to be a big sister. Her little brother is due February 8 of next year. She will have her hands full watching out for him that's for sure. 

I also want to give a big thank you to those of you who follow this blog and who have supported us through prayer or kind words. We are so blessed to have the people that we do in our lives. We continue to ask for prayers as we miss our sweet girl daily and also for her brother to be healthy and safe. Thank you all from the bottom of our hearts.